Humor! Krolvin Style

[Dragonspine and Mithril]

The flow of the crowd parts around a large hole in the middle of the road. A dwarven work crew stands around the hole, doing very little work. From the many shops and vendors’ stalls along the street, you hear the cries of hawkers, the lamentations of hagglers and the occasional clink of a coin. You also see a corroded iron strongbox and a small stone building with a large wooden sign on it. Obvious paths: north, south, east

You notice Trudok who is quite obviously attempting to remain hidden.

You gesture while summoning the spirits of nature to aid you with the Spike Thorn spell...
Your spell is ready.

Dozens of long thorns suddenly grow out from the ground underneath Trudok!
Several of the thorns jab into him!
... hits for 8 points of damage!
... 20 points of damage!
Strike pierces calf!
He is knocked to the ground!
He is stunned!
... hits for 6 points of damage!
... 20 points of damage!
Shot pierces a wrist!

You fire a heavy crossbow bolt at Trudok!
AS: +593 vs DS: +217 with AvD: +25 + d100 roll: +74 = +475
... and hit for 128 points of damage!
Strike to the eye penetrates skull, ocular fluid sprays widely!

[Dragonspine and Mithril]

The flow of the crowd parts around a large hole in the middle of the road. A dwarven work crew stands around the hole, doing very little work. From the many shops and vendors’ stalls along the street, you hear the cries of hawkers, the lamentations of hagglers and the occasional clink of a coin. You also see a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a rolvin brigand that appears rather calm, a peak lynx, a white panther, a corroded iron strongbox and a small stone building with a large wooden sign on it.
Also here: the body of Tracker Trudok who is lying down
Obvious paths: north, south, east

Flicking with a bit more energy than usual, the toad you just aimed at
Sankir hits him right on the posterior!

You remove a dwarf-cut ruby from in your drawstring rucksack.

You say, “Oooh! Scary, go ahead, my god will avenge me”

Sankir harshly says, “Yer Gods are weaklings.”

Sankir harshly says, “Fittin’ fer ya.”

You say, “Most likely Eonak wouldna give ya the time o day”

Sankir taps his cutlass in his palm. For a moment he stares at you in cold consideration. Then his eyes narrow, and with a vicious spinning move he slams the cutlass into your chest!

The rolvin Sankir lowers his shoulder and hurls himself at you! Unable to twist out of the way, you are knocked flat on your butt!

Sankir swings a bone shard edged razern cutlass at you!
AS: +484 vs DS: -17 with AvD: +24 + d100 roll: +34 = +559
... and hits for 121 points of damage!
Shot shatters shoulder and severs right arm!
The buzz of thoughts in your mind subsides.

[Bloodfist’s Tent]

Carved thanot poles frame the perimeter of the rolvin tent, the interior enclosed by walls of dyed burlap. The packed dirt floor appears to be routinely swept and a rectangular woven reed mat has been laid next to a simple wooden chair in the midst of the tent. An imposing desk covered with partly-furled maps, scrolls, and papers resides in a corner, facing the burly rolvin guards standing guard near the tent’s flap, their observant eyes belying their relaxed poses.
Also here: Bloodfist Sankir
Obvious exits: none

You hear the faint thoughts of Esserae echo in your mind:
”I’d’ve boarded the rolvin ship, but somebody sank’ir.”

You hear the faint thoughts of Turinrond echo in your mind:
"Will ye be serving tea with your observations, Comet Jumper?"

You hear the faint thoughts of Turinrond echo in your mind:
"Mayhaps we can build a "Welcome to Teras, Krolvin" banner and place it at the statue where ye lurk, Comet stumbler."

You hear the faint thoughts of Turinrond echo in your mind:
"And serve tea and biscuits at the party"

[Dragonspine and Krodera]

The street widens into a circular plaza several hundred feet across. Dwarves and giantmen lounge on stone benches by a massive granite fountain in the center. The burbling of the waters, the low mumblings of the dwarves and the booming laughter of the giants somehow blend together into a vibrant harmony. You also see the Zvardin disk, a sturdy thanot coffer, the black Zefar disk, a fork-marked lemur that is sitting, a green starstone, some aloeas stem, a krolvin head impaled upon a spike and a red granite statue.
Also here: Lord Turinrond, Comet-rider Arkdaln, Lady Lizabethany, Syenite, Airsong, Maimara, Azorack who is sitting, Gothique, Awnro
Obvious paths: north, south, east, west

Registrar Sankir just arrived.
Sankir scowls.
Sankir harshly exclaims, "Keep it down, 'er!"
Sankir mutters under his breath.
Registrar Sankir just went west.

You hear the faint thoughts of Akhri echo in your mind:
"We are marinating the flesh of your banker."

You hear your own faint thoughts echoing in your head:
"Now you've gone too far."

You hear the faint thoughts of Tayvin echo in your mind:
"He pwolly won't wike dat"

Arkdaln whispers, “Such a primal way to open a box.”
You hear someone calling upon the powers of the elements...

Arkdaln fades into sight just as a stream of fire shoots forth from the chest! Arkdaln is savagely immolated by the flames! As the flames surround his head, his skin begins to melt under the intense heat! As you stand there dazed, Arkdaln’s eyes reach the boiling point and burst open, spraying sizzling vitreous fluid all over you! Arkdaln falls to his knees and releases a pitiful moan before collapsing into a smoldering heap on the ground.

Grarg growls at Xulia "LEAVE NOW."

Xulia says, "Oh! Okay!"

(Wanders to a different room to look for discarded pastry and other assorted booty)

Grarg growls, "Stay on this isle."

Xulia says, "Oh! Okay!"

You gesture at a krolvin corsair.
A void rips open in the area, directly above a krolvin corsair!
Rather abrupt decompression causes a krolvin corsair to explode!
Billions and billions of tiny corsair bits shower everything.
Quite severely dead.
A krolvin mercenary gasps for air and is stunned!
A krolvin mercenary gasps for air and is stunned!
A krolvin warrior gasps for what little breath it can!
A krolvin warfarer gasps for air and is stunned!
A krolvin despoiler gasps for air and is stunned!
A number of items ranging from 14 to 22 feet from the void were sucked into the blackness. The void disappears without further incident.
You gesture at Trudok.

A void rips open in the area, directly above Trudok!
Roaring winds confuse Trudok.
+8 Hits.

The Dwarven deputy is not affected by the vacuum of the void.

* Trudok drops dead at your feet!

The deputy stares at you and suddenly says, "I been looking for ya Zvardin!
Seems you have earned a vacation in the jail!"

Khortal did nothing too bad,
merely dismissed my calling him an ape with,
"This coming from one named after rodents."

You hear your own faint thoughts echoing in your head:
"I can't believe ya'd attack a guy with a flask of drink in his hand!"

You hear the faint thoughts of Grarg echo in your mind:
"Believe it fool."

Prep 615
Cast At katc

You gesture while summoning the spirits of nature to aid you with the Call Swarm spell...

Your spell is ready.
You gesture at Katchakya.
You shouldn't bug the staff with this.
Cast Roundtime 3 Seconds.

Clintmire leaps from hiding to attack!
Clintmire swings a falchion at Khortal!
AS: +504 vs DS: +373 with AvD: +39 + d100 roll: +74 = +244
... and hits for 6 points of damage!
Love tap upside Khortal's head!
The scintillating light surrounding the falchion fades some.

Clintmire leaps from hiding to attack!
Clintmire swings a falchion at Khortal!
AS: +504 vs DS: +284 with AvD: +39 + d100 roll: +58 = +317
... and hits for 59 points of damage!
Incredible blast shatters head into a red spray.

You gesture at Eregrek.
You hurl a roaring ball of fire at Eregrek!
AS: +450 vs DS: +255 with AvD: +28 + d100 roll: +96 = +319
... and hit for 78 points of damage!
Flames burn hole in chest exposing ribs!
He is stunned!
The roaring ball of fire strikes Eregrek, blossoming into a much larger sphere of flame upon impact.
... 1 point of damage!
Flames tickle right eye. Eyebrow singed.

A krolvin raider swings a twohanded sword at Eregrek! AS: +460 vs DS: +235 with AvD: +35 + d100 roll: +97 = +357 ... and hits for 78 points of damage! Quick, powerful slash to Eregrek's right knee!

* Eregrek drops dead at your feet!

You hurl a powerful lightning bolt at Klaagh! AS: +505 vs DS: +367 with AvD: +51 + d100 roll: +38 = +227 ... and hit for 18 points of damage! Heavy spark to left eye causes tears and redness.

* Klaagh drops dead at your feet!

Gkig gestures at you.
A void rips open in the area, directly above you!
Rather abrupt decompression causes you to explode!
Billions and billions of tiny bits of flesh shower everything.
Quite severely dead.

* Tayvin has been vaporized!

The white light leaves you.
The very powerful look leaves you.
The bright luminescence fades from around you.
You no longer bristle with energy.
Your SIGN OF SHIELDS is no longer effective.
The light blue glow leaves you.
You feel the aura of confidence leave you.
You become solid again.
Your SIGN OF STRIKING is no longer effective.
You notice the faint image of yourself disappear.
You come back into focus.
The translucent sphere fades from around you.
A luminescent aura fades from around you.
Your SIGN OF DISSIPATION is no longer effective.
The brilliant luminescence fades from around you.
Your senses are no longer as sharp.
Your SIGN OF DEFENDING is no longer effective.
Your SIGN OF STAUNCHING is no longer effective.
The tingling sensation and sense of security leaves you.
You lose your extra internal fortitude.
Your SIGN OF SMITING is no longer effective.
You feel less confident than before.
The silvery luminescence fades from around you.
You return to normal color.
Your SIGN OF SWORDS is no longer effective.
The dim aura fades from around you.
You notice your blood flow go back to normal.
The deep blue glow leaves you.
The buzz of thoughts in your mind subsides.
The brilliant aura fades away from you.
You no longer feel so dextrous.
Your SIGN OF WARDING is no longer effective.
You feel your extra magical awareness leave you.
Your SIGN OF DEFLECTION is no longer effective.
You feel your extra strength departing.
The powerful look leaves you.
The air about you stops shimmering.
The wall of force disappears from around you.

Dat wee lil hobbit sure was rubbin an raisin tings fer da hour leadin up ta big boat party!
~nod nod~

Eregrek says, "Tell us more or..."

Eregrek glances at a broad-bladed waraxe.

You hear the ghostly voice of Gnork ask, "Tell more or what?"

You hear the ghostly voice of Gnork say, "If I tell you then you know how far it is accomplished."

Scheree nods to Gnork.

You hear the ghostly voice of Gnork say, "If I don't then you don't and it may succeed."

Kismia looks over at Gnork and shakes her head.

Eregrek asks, "Is that your final answer?"

Shadya begins chuckling at Eregrek!

Eregrek glances at Gnork.